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stacy_cats
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Name: Stacy
Gender: Female
Interests: Living joy, family, writing, homeschooling, photography, graphic arts, drumming, reading, web development, cross stitching, coding (vb.net), practicing the art of allowing
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Website: visit my website
Member Since:
3/29/2006
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| Recent (and some less-than-recent) events in my life have led me to some pretty intense work on Self. There has been a "stripping away" of sorts, and I had an epiphany about myself about a week ago that tilted my world in a new way. One thing led to another, and I came upon a book I had purchased for myself several years ago, but never read. It was mentioned in another book I was reading, and after I read the title (The Dark Side of the Light Chasers) I could not shake it from my mind. So, finally last Saturday, I went to my bookshelf and found it. I am only on the second exercise (about three chapters in) but my world-view is really changing. Not to mention my self-view. That's now pretty much on its head!
The idea (as far as I've gotten) behind the book is that we, as humans, are holographic by nature. That is to say that each of us contains all the parts of the Whole. The author, Debbie Ford, likens it to the holographic image on our credit cards. She says that if you cut that up into small pieces, each piece will retain the full image of the whole. I haven't tried this experiment yet, but you can be sure I will. (If it's photograph-able, I'll post my results as well. But that's for later. Back to the premise....)
So, as holographic beings, we humans contain all the attributes of all other humans somewhere inside of us. This means that, everything we are capable of seeing or experiencing in another person, is also a part of ourselves. If it is a thing we do not like, then it is just probably very well-hidden in ourselves.
Another illustration she used was to picture yourself as a big mansion or castle. When we were children, we went from room to room in this huge place of Self and explored with abandon. Each "room" held its own treasures, and we were eager to see what we could find. Then, little by little, other people - Mother, Father, Pastor, Teacher, Sister, Brother, Friend, etc. - began telling us that some of those rooms were inappropriate or wrong, and we were encouraged (or even sometimes forced) to close the doors on those rooms. If we felt enough shame (or fear, or hurt, etc.) about the contents of that aspect of ourselves, we not only closed the door, but we locked it and threw away the key. Over the years, we have denied huge parts of ourselves, and if we're using the mansion illustration, it could be said that most of us are left with two or three functioning rooms. Most of the rest we either heartily deny or do our best to ignore.
The trouble with these locked rooms (well, one of the troubles, anyway) is that we spend an enormous amount of time and energy trying to hide them from anyone who might catch a glimpse of them - including ourselves. The irony is, that most people close to us (if asked to be candid) could list off the aspects of our shadow self without hesitation!
Right now, I am at the stage where I am trying to identify those things that are my Shadow. From what I can tell so far, these are aspects that I feel some kind of negative emotion about - anything from mild annoyance to full-blown angry denial. Ms. Ford says that our Shadow aspects are often those that we see in other people as annoying or worse. I already believe - no, I know - that we are all reflections of one another, so this was a relatively easy concept for me to assimilate. Well, it was relatively easy until I started looking at some of the specific people who irritate me! It hasn't been very easy for me to swallow that pill so far, but even as it is uncomfortable to consider that I have dishonest, manipulative, dismissive, arrogant, mean, and even cruel aspects to my personality, I have also found that it feels... True.
So, I thought I'd share some of this journey here. As much as I dare to, anyway. I have some friends with whom I've discussed this, and it was a very interesting conversation to say the least. If you have thoughts, I'd love to hear about them.
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| Oh come on! Is this a trick question??
(There I go again, thinking my opinion is so obvious that everyone else in the Universe must surely share it....)
The ocean, the ocean, the ocean! (Of course!!)
I love everything about the ocean. The sound of the sea hitting the shore is the best lullaby in the world. The smell of salt in the air makes me want to dance. The feel of the ageless salt water against my skin is like a caress directly from God. Ooh, and put on some goggles and just look at what's underneath its surface sometime!
Why don't I live near this thing I love so much? Good question. I think I'll ponder a bit.
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| I would definitely rather know it all.
I believe there is great power in Knowing. I have certain hopes, and even beliefs. But if I knew the 'secrets' to life, the universe, and everything, I believe I would have perfect peace.
Of course, I believe this is cheating. If I knew it all, I couldn't help but also have it all. ;)
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| It's from a song by (brace yourself for a shock...) Aerosmith. I know, I know, you never saw it coming.
The song is about the recovery from drug addiction that pretty much all the members of the band went through, though I'm pretty sure this is from Steven Tyler's point of view. It's called "Amazing", and it is definitely that. In fact, during some of the darkest times of my illness, I used to hang onto Steven's crooned words, "And I'm sayin' a prayer for the desperate hearts tonight." I used to pretend that every time I heard it, he really was praying for me. In fact, I was saying the prayer for myself, and ultimately, it worked.
But that's not the quote that I get inspiration from.
It's at the very end, and the words are not sung. Steven Tyler speaks them while playing a carnival box in the background.
Ready? It's really, really great. Here goes:
. . .
Remember. The light at the end of the tunnel... may be You!
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| No. I'm pretty happy with the idea of living about a century. I believe that Life continues after (so-called) 'death', so I'll want to see what's next.
How about I die (ha!) laughing on November 11, 2077 at 11:11PM at the age of 111. I'll have to finish my 73rd NaNoWriMo book early that year! 50,000 words in ten days! What a way to go!
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